& i just want to please please cry.
because it's the only way i can even write anything of decent stature.
it's depressing, being all limited in your element.
i can't do it anymore. so how can i?

i went to the little mountains today, & my gosh they were so beautiful.
so so splendid & colorful & raw & really really real.

i just want to write it all away, but it's almost impossible.

i want to write my heart out to you. but i'm scared you won't understand. i want to scream at you, but i'm afraid you won't hear me. then let me go away. to that field, where it's quite & simple. where the world stops at sun set & lets me write out all my ambitions and hurts.
today i was told what i have done is trash. & my heart burned at the words, as they etched into my brain in the tiniest of manuscript.
am i just another teenager to you? just another myspace-loving, computer-hogging, lovesick teenager?
i don't want to be. & i don't believe i am. so what about you?